The years that I have lived in depression, not even realizing that’s what it was. The pure survival mode- living every day in a habit. Going through the motions to do it all over again.
I’m certain these words have been written by dozens of people.
You may be feeling this same way.
I started my growth seriously-ish when my girls were little, and I was listening to “Girl Wash Your Face” in my earbuds as I made dinner. Every day, I would come home in time to listen to “The Morning Show” with Rach and Dave. I would write down my gratitude and goals, wake up at 3 am excited to work on my business, and then meet my friends at the park to work out.
I find myself wondering what happened to that girl who had her heart on fire for excitement. Did the new wear off? Was it the way I felt after finding out that Rach and Dave were divorcing during Covid? Was it the ruse of the happiness they performed for the sake of their brand? It could have been the stupid feeling that came over me, knowing I had used these people as a guide in the storm, only to realize they were not where I wanted to be going.
In reality, and now that I’m a grown-up, I know that I am responsible for the life I want and the one I currently have. I know how much having a guide helped me. Why can’t I guide someone else?
I crave that life I created, one centered around the sense of belonging to a community of people who were after the same thing: structure, goals, health, happiness, and friends.
I feel called to create a community that was lost.
How many other women like me are there?
